Happy Easter! Alleluia! Christ is Risen!

Easter is the season where we celebrate Jesus Christ’s resurrection. He conquered death so we are able to have eternal life with Him in heaven.  Easter reminds us that we are not made to die, but in order to live we must die to sin and rise with Jesus – new life. The season of Lent prepares us to celebrate Easter, and you know Lent was a success if the Easter season is greeted with great joy.

Every year we have the best of intentions to make daily sacrifices that will draw us closer to God. Some years are more successful than others.

This year was unique for us.

A couple weeks before Lent we received good news from our doctor confirming that we were pregnant again. The news filled us with great joy to be blessed with another irreplaceable life.  After losing five babies prenatally, we were also worried and anxious that this pregnancy would, too, end similarly.

At the beginning of February, we spoke about our grief and our hope while serving as witness speakers in anticipation for our Parish’s Eucharistic Congress. During our talk we shared a spiritual vision related to our children that Rex experienced while praying in the presence of the Eucharist – the body, blood, soul and divinity of Jesus. So many more people have been praying for us as a result of our willingness to share. Since then, we have felt shrouded in their prayers and we are incredibly grateful.

After we gave the witness talk, our anxiety and fear about miscarrying subsided. We entered the season of Lent with great joy in anticipation of what would unfold – whatever it may be. We accepted what we could not control, and we know it is because of everyone’s prayers [including our children’s] that we relaxed during this pregnancy, which was a blessing in and of itself.

All we could do is trust in God. He is the author of all life. So, we prayed. Waited. Hoped. Trusted.

Mid-way through Lent we received all too familiar news from our doctor. “There has been no growth. You should expect to miscarry in a week or two.”

It hasn’t gotten easier hearing those words from our doctor. It feels like a ton of bricks has fallen upon us. We experience guilt because of our doubts. We go through awful, consuming periods of anger and jealousy because of the unfairness of it all – with so many unplanned, unmarried pregnancies that are prevalent in our culture, why can’t we have a baby? And, of course, we experience sadness as we grieve that the next nine months will not be as we hoped for.

Our grief and anger is offset by our hope in Jesus Christ. Having entered into the season of Easter, we rejoice in knowing that Christ rose from the dead and that our children are with Him, singing glory and praise with the angels and saints in heaven. How glorious!

In the words of our Archbishop, J. Peter Sartain, May Christ’s victory over death fill you with light and hope, and may you find in him the fulfillment of your deepest longing.